a couple in love with each otherIf you’re pining over your ex-boyfriend and desperately thinking of ways to get him to love you again, it is important to realize that although it may be possible depending on the circumstances surrounding your breakup, it may not be an easy thing to do. That being said, don’t lose heart as there may be several things you can do to get him to fall in love with you again.

First of all, it is always advisable to step back and look at the relationship objectively so you can identify what went wrong the first time. Taking an honest look at yourself to determine whether you’re actually currently in the right place for a relationship right now is also important to be clear on. Even though there may be a chance or the two for you to get back together, doing so right at this moment may not be the best thing if you’re needing a little space and time to yourself.

What went wrong in the relationship? Honestly..? Was it all one-sided? Often that’s not the case. If there were differences between you then it will be important to discuss them and for the both of you to put them behind you if you’re going to get back together to make sure your relationship sticks the second time around.

Although you may be missing him like crazy right now, he might be enjoying the space to himself. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder. However, this doesn’t always apply in every circumstance, so you need to be prepared. Here’s what you need to do.

Getting Him To Love You Again

Start by focusing on yourself

Build your self-esteem. Don’t become too desperate or needy by begging or pleading with your ex to get back together with you. This kind of behavior will more likely push him further away. Don’t sit around thinking about how sad and heartbroken you are. Rather you should get back out there and regain your social life with your friends.

Reconnecting with your friends and enjoy your freedom a little will do wonders to boost your confidence and take your mind off of him. With a renewed sense of self-esteem, you will begin to feel, look and act in a more attractive way. It is important to create a life away from your ex to avoid falling into the trap of becoming needy. He will find you more attractive if you’re not sitting around waiting for him to come back to you.

Relater post: Using the no contact rule to get him back

Forget about the negative past

Yes, you need to take care of yourself during this period but don’t start ignoring the guy because you want to teach him a lesson. Actually, he might find you a bit immature so regardless of whether you’re feeling a bit negative about the past, if you want him back, you should learn how to be friendly and cordial. That way, you can meet up and have a proper conversation to determine whether you can actually get back together or not.

Make sure you have the right mindset before meeting with him

Regardless of whether it was a serious or casual relationship in the past, you should identify that the old relationship is now over and dead. Just like other people, you’re most likely going to imagine that you can hope right back to where things ended the last time. Rather, you should focus on getting your ex back and building a completely new relationship with him as the two of you should have hopefully grown for the experience.

See also: Getting him to regret the breakup

Make sure you’re looking and feeling sexy

Certainly, you want to remind your ex of what he’s missing out on from not being with you. So you’re planning to meet up, make sure you get your beauty sleep, get in shape, wear your best clothes, do your hair the way you know he likes and maybe even get a manicure too. Put things in front of him that will remind him of the reasons he fell in love with you in the first place. Put your best foot forward and do more listening than talking during the conversation. Let him see a calmer, more composed and happier you.

a woman showing her boyfriend images on her cell phoneRemind him of the positive things in your relationship

When you’re on a date with your ex, you should remind him of the positive things and memories you shared. Bring up those good feelings in your relationship and remind him of the positive emotions he felt about the special moments you both shared together. Take him back to past memories and remind him why you are so good together.


Flirt with him a little

If the vibe feels right then flirt with him a little during your meeting. If you’re both feeling the vibe then it’ll be fun for both of you and will also trigger some primal urges allowing him to reciprocate. A little flirting can do wonders in getting him to want you back.

You can always try some playful touching, flirtatious eye contact and make him feel that he is comfortable around you. Once you have created a good rapport with your ex on the first date, you can keep up the connection through strategic and we” placed text messages. However, make sure that he’s also building the bridge to avoid looking like you’re too needy.

If you’re not sure what to text him in order to get him back, then see our article here on texting an ex boyfriend to get him back.

Remind him of the intimacy you both shared

Remind him of how good everything was before it ended. Of course, you need to be subtle about it rather than blurting everything out in the open. If he knows what you’re doing he might not take too kindly to it. For instance, you can start by talking about one of your great adventures from the past and see how he responds to you bringing it up. If you had a great and memorable sexual experience, bring it up if the vibe feels right. If you do this right then he may start to remember you in that moment and start to want to be intimate with you again. Remind him of the event that led to a great love making session but not a quickie. Make him remember every little aspect of that day and he will associate you with it. You will know when he’s thinking about it because he will not be able to move his eyes off you. Another sign that he is in that place is that he may also be leaning towards you more. Keep him in that limbo and let him remember how things were that good when the two of you were together.

See also: Can you get him back if he’s moved on?

Do all you can not to push him away

If you were responsible for the breakup, you need to find a way to ensure that you do not repeat the same mistake again and also ask for his forgiveness. Show him that what happened was in the past and you were wrong. If he was in the wrong, make sure he knows what he did wrong and if he is ready to make amends, then you’re on the right path of getting back together.

Keep in mind that one reason relationships don’t work out is because there is too much ego from one or both partners. Two people might be deeply in love with each other but are not willing to apologize for their mistakes, which will inevitably cause friction and resentment over time.

If you’re needing some time on your own then don’t force yourself to get back together with him straight away. A break may do the both of you some good. Depending on the reason for the breakup, you might need a reason to heal and forget about each other’s role in it. Therefore, if you approach him and he also says he needs time, don’t pressure him into getting back together with you. Take that time as well to think about yourself and whether this is what you really want.


If you love him that much, you may not have to let go of everything completely and there still could be a chance that you can still be happy together. First, take the time to heal and find out if you’re both in the right place to get back together. Both of you should be willing to give it a try if the love is not lost after the first breakup. Be subtle and don’t appear too needy because that will actually push him further away.