a woman meeting her ex boyfriend over coffeeMany women break up with their partner only to feel sorry immediately after. In other situations, the guy is the one who decides to put an end to the relationship, leaving the girl astounded and miserable.

If you are in one of the above situations and you want to get your boyfriend to want you again, you should know that hope may not be not dead yet. The following steps has helped thousands of women re-ignite the passion in the soul of their ex-partner so it may work for you as well.

How To Get Him Back Again After A Breakup

As this isn’t going to be easy, you should have a plan and follow it closely. First of all, you need to know everything you’re going to try, step by step, until you manage to make him dream about the possibility of getting back together with you.

Distance and the no contact rule

If you have recently broken up, then the first step is to put some distance between the two of you. This is going to sound contrary to what you naturally feel like doing, but if the breakup is still relatively fresh, then you need to allow some space for the both of you first to cool down if there has been any heated arguments and to allow your ex to have some space.

Having this no contact period will also in time, cause him to naturally start to think of you, and wonder what you are doing. He will most likely at some point during this phase wonder if you are okay without him and may even have moments of doubt as to whether the two of you made the right choice so separate.

Whatever you do, make sure you don’t come across needy, as this is a big turn-off for anyone, male or female. During this period, spend some time thinking about what went wrong in the relationship and take note of any lessons you can draw from it and learn from. Make a list of all possible reasons. Maybe you were too controlling or too jealous. Maybe he didn’t feel you as being affectionate enough. Maybe you were always fighting over minor issues such as doing the dishes and vacuuming the floors.

The point is, in most relationships, there is usually fault on both sides for the breakup. Understanding your part in it will help you to avoid those mistakes in the future if you do get back together with him or in another relationship if it is clear the two of you should move on.

See also: The Art Of Dirty Talk

Work on yourself

The next step is to work on becoming more self-confident and happier with your life. If needed, you should hire a life coach to help you improve areas if you need help and guidance. This is going to help you take a step back and reassess your life and your relationship.

After this step, you should find a renewed sense of self-confidence. You may also discover aspects of yourself that help you to grow. Some people do also find that these realizations can bring about an understanding that actually your ex is not the best person for you and decide to move on completely. However, if you’re still in the game of making up, you should proceed to the next step, which is to let him see the new you.

See also: Becoming More Attractive To Guys

Use social media

a couple reminiscing about their relationshipIf the two of you are still friends on social media, then it is highly likely at some point he may have checked out your profile once or twice to see what you’re up to and who you are hanging out with. Use this to your advantage!

This doesn’t mean to take the opportunity to try to make him jealous by posting pictures of yourself with loads of guys as that can also get you look a bit needy. Instead, post pictures of yourself going out and having fun with your friends, enjoying yourself and maybe even indulging in an adventure here and there that he would think you may otherwise not do.

If extreme sports like skydiving and bungee jumping are not your thing then perhaps try something not as extreme but also shows that you are coming out of yourself and enjoying your freedom.

Basically, the intention is to let him see that you are okay on your own and you are having a good time without him, which can sometimes cause him to regret breaking up with you.

Find out if he’s still interested

At this stage you will want to find out if there is still a chance for the two of you or if he has moved on. Show up in places you know he frequents, but don’t make it too obvious that you’re there for him; you don’t want to come across like a stalker. If you do your homework well, you are going to meet each other by accident in a restaurant, coffee shop of theater.

What you have to do next depends on multiple factors. Is he with someone else? Are you with another guy? Have you just run into each other while shopping for groceries? A chance encounter can help you gauge his reaction to seeing you and give you an idea of how receptive he may be in speaking with you.

Text messages are also a great too that you can use to get your ex boyfriend back into your life. However, it is very important that you send the right messages at the right times or you could mess things up for good. To find out exactly how you can text your ex back into your life, read our article here.

You may also like: The Subtle Signs He’s Into You

Suggest a meet up

If all seems well and he it looks like he would be open to having a conversation with you then casually suggesting a meet up over coffee just to see how the two of you are getting along is the next step.

Keep the meeting friendly and platonic and use it as a chance to genuinely find out how he is doing and take an interest in his life.

If at this point you still feel like you do want him back and there seems that there may still be a chance for the two of you, then hinting to him that you’re open for rebuilding your connection on a higher level of passion and trust can be the way to go.


Whatever path you choose, don’t become his doormat. You shouldn’t agree with everything he wants, as this is going to make him respect you less. Always remember that you are the most important human being, so your wishes have to be respected.

By this time, if you see him eager to give your relationship one more try, be smart and resist the burning desire to jump straight back into bed with him again. Show him that you are interested, tell him that a part of you would like to get intimate with him straight away, but you want to wait. However, explaining to him that another part of you feels exposed, so you believe it’s wiser to wait for a little longer before getting this close again. This will make him respect you more.

If he is a decent guy and he truly respects you, then your patience will pay off in the end.