If it’s not something that you’re use to then you may be pleasantly surprised to hear that learning how to talk dirty to your boyfriend is not as difficult as you first may think. If it is not something that comes naturally to you then with time and practice it is a skill that you can learn.
Do you have a friend that has the ability to turn almost any guy on? Does she always seem to have a string of men after her? Are you in awe of her and a also maybe just a little bit jealous?
Her secret may not have anything to do with her sexual repertoire or looks. She may be a conversational witch and a dirty talk master! If you want to learn how to cultivate these skills and learn the right way to talk dirty to your guy, this article will help do it right.
How And When To Talk Dirty To Your Boyfriend
- 1 How And When To Talk Dirty To Your Boyfriend
- 1.1 What You Say Is Not as Important as How You Say It
- 1.2 Body Language Can Help Drive Your Point Home
- 1.3 Learn What Turns Your Man On
- 1.4 Timing is Vital
- 1.5 The Element of Surprise
- 1.6 Use Pauses When You Speak
- 1.7 It’s All About Your Mindset
- 1.8 Be Mindful of What You Say
- 1.9 Taking It To Another Level
- 1.10 Final Thoughts
What You Say Is Not as Important as How You Say It
If you are looking for suggestions on how to talk dirty to your man, just do a quick online search, and you can find lists of phrases and words to use while talking dirty to a guy. However, you should realize that the words you use are not as important as you think.
The way you address your man, how much attention you give him, your attitude, intention and how you use your tonality and your tempo when you’re talking to him count for a lot more.
When you want to talk dirty to your man, speak softly, slowly and seductively. Do not try to memorize lines from your favorite websites or movies. Instead, pay attention to how you are delivering your message, your attitude and pay attention to how he is reacting to you.
Some women find it helpful to mimick a favorite actresses from a movie when being seductive. Find your inner seductress to help you talk dirty to your man.
Body Language Can Help Drive Your Point Home
Non-verbal signals are one of the best ways to ensure that you have your man’s full attention. You want to inflame his passions using a sultry voice. When you talk dirty, you should always be aware of what your body language is also saying to your man. He wants a seductress who is sure of herself, so relax and enjoy how you are playing with him.
If you want to get your man all hot and horny for you with your words, then you also need to make sure that your body language is backing up what you are saying.
Softening your eyes, moving more slowly and fixing your attention on him will all help to deliver the right message.
Being seductive is all about feeling that sexy quality withing yourself and then being able to convey it to your man with your words and actions. To be truly seductive you need to be able to be in touch with your own sexiness and come from that place when you talk to him.
If you think that being sexy and seductive is not who you are or not a skill that you have, don’t worry, every woman can do this, it’s just that some women can do it naturally or intuitively. For the rest of the women who don’t have this talent then it is something that you can learn to do.
Learn What Turns Your Man On
A seductress understands that the same words will not work with every man. Men are unique creatures and what turns one man on may not have the same effect on another. Learning what makes your man get steamy under the collar will help you to focus on the right things when laying down your sexy talk.
You can increase the passion in your relationship with dirty talk; however, as your relationship grows, you will learn more about what gets your guy off, and you will have even more fire-power to driving him crazy. Pay attention to what catches his naughty desire and interweave it into your dirty talk.
Related Article: Sexting – Secrets Of Talking Dirty With Text Messages
Timing is Vital
A significant part of a successful dirty talk session is the timing. Do not try to force a sexual situation when there are signs that the timing may not be right.
Tune into his mood and the situation and place that you are both in. Is he in a jovial, cheeky or playful mood? If so then he will probably be very receptive to some good dirty talk.
The Element of Surprise
Using spontaneity and surprise can be a great way to get your guy going. Men can be easily distracted, and their thoughts can turn from work to sex in a second.
If you’re not with him at the time, then one way to get your man going is to send him a dirty text that needs a reply from him. Something like, “Mmm, I’m sitting here thinking of you, and I just had to touch myself… What are you wearing right now? Xx’ can be a great way to surprise him and get the dirty convo going.
Use Pauses When You Speak
Can you imagine if you were dating a guy and the two of you were alone together, when all of a sudden he turns to you, takes your hand and looks deeply into your eyes? You brace yourself for what was to come next, only for him to say the sexiest things to you but at lightning speed. It doesn’t really have the same effect does it. Not only is he talking far to fast for you to be able to process it, the tempo would just be way off, and it would lose a great deal of the meaning.
Be mindful of the rate at which you speak, especially when you are wanting to be more seductive or use dirty talk. If you’re a person who talks fast anyway, then you will need to be more mindful of this.
Inserting pauses strategically is an excellent way to help you slow down and to give the guy a chance to enjoy what you are saying. Furthermore, inserting small pauses in appropriate places when you talk helps to build intrigue in what you’re saying and is a surprisingly alluring tactic.
It’s All About Your Mindset
So far, this article has discussed the art of talking dirty without using vulgar language. Although there is nothing wrong with this type of language, you should only use it when you are sure that you and your man will not be overheard by anyone else.
When using the really naughty words, it is wise to get to know him a bit better first so you will have an idea of what words he finds acceptable, which ones he really finds a turn on and which ones make him cringe.
Not every guy will appreciate the same words when it comes to talking dirty to get to know him a bit better first so you can make the right choice when it comes to selecting the phrases that would likely shock your grandma.
However, if the really naughty words are just not your thing, then you will be relieved to know that dirty words and dirty talk are two distinct things that do not necessarily need to intersect when it comes to turning your man on. It all comes down to what you feel comfortable with, what you can convey in a natural and sexy way and what kinds of things he would really love to hear you say.
Remember it is more about how you say things than it is the words that you use. Furthermore, avoiding those dirty words will spur your man’s creativity and will have him thinking of new and unique ways to describe what he wants to do to you.
Be Mindful of What You Say
When you are talking dirty to a guy, bear in mind that you are also actually suggesting the two of you get physical and down to all the nasty things that you are describing.
If you’re not willing to follow through on any of the things that you are planning to say, then don’t say it, or you will come across as a tease, which he won’t appreciate.
If you are talking dirty to your boyfriend or husband, then there will naturally be a level of comfort, closeness and mutual respect between the two of you. This is the ideal connection to have with a guy and a safe environment for you to let go and talk dirty to each other and have fun with it.
If however, you are still getting to know each other then you may want to tone it down a little for several reasons. One, you may still be learning what he is all about and not quite sure yet of his comfort level.
Secondly, and more importantly, you should also consider your safety if you are not yet too familiar with the guy. It is generally not advisable to talk dirty to a guy until you have established a good amount of trust and respect between the two of you and you know that he is a safe person with which to start exploring a more intimate relationship.
See also: How To Tell If A Shy Guy Likes You
Taking It To Another Level
When you talk dirty to your man, it can also involve some sexy role-playing if you’re both up for it. During your dirty talk, you can tease and excite your man by creating a fantasy for the two of you. However, bear in mind the point earlier about only suggesting things that you are comfortable with and would like to experience with him.
The purpose of dirty talk is to stimulate and please one another and is supposed to be an enjoyable experience for you both.
If you are also role playing, then you may want to have an emergency or safe word that either of you can use if you want to stop at any time. This word should be non-sexy and can be used by either partner before things get out of control.
Needing to use a safe word at the end of a steamy role play session may not be the most sexy way to finish the encounter, but it is certainly better than things getting out of hand to the point of one person becoming embarrassed or disrespected.
When it comes to talking dirty, harness your inner seductress. Use your creativity to learn how to stoke your man’s libido. Learning how to make your man want you is the point of dirty talk. With practice, you can become a powerful seductress both in and out of the bedroom.
Watch movies with a powerful woman that know how to seduce a man to help you learn the best tactics for dirty talk. Speak in a seductive voice and ensure that it is the appropriate time and place to seduce your man. Remember, when it comes to exciting your man, how you say something is more important than what you say.